Worst thing since   Leave a comment

Imagine what they’d do to a human if they got the chance.

Tuesday was not a day, despite any evidence to the contrary.

This is definitely a relief to my fingers and keyboard, and probably to my reader(s). It wasn’t a relief to other bits of my right arm, which woke up with a rash. I have no idea why. It’s still there, and still a bit itchy.

Otherwise, the notable events (excuse my stretching the term) were as follows:

Firstly, I hung up the finally-painted radiator in the finally-decorated bedroom. Hurrah! It looks pretty good, I think, and if it didn’t then it would just be tough. Unfortunately, I noticed that the bit behind the fin along the top hadn’t covered very well for some reason, or had been rubbed off when I painted the front. It’s not very noticable, unless you stand right next to the radiator and look down, but worth touching up one day before the carpet’s installed. So no rush then.

Thirdly, in the evening, I considered going to the gym. And then decided it was a bit warm, especially as my shorts were grubby (and woe betide he who goes to get hot and sweaty in grubby shorts!). So instead I went to Morrisons (in jeans), and was remarkably circumspect on the pies/doughnuts/etc. front. Unfortunately, the idiot supermarketeers had spoiled all their perfectly good bread by slicing it. Why do they do that? It beggars belief. They did have some otherwise-interesting bread reduced to 5p, which was just about acceptable. Hear that, supermarketeers? That’s what your sliced loaves are worth. Five pence. I would rather have had a proper loaf for £1.20, though.

Secondly, at lunchtime, I cut my thumb. I cut it on the lid of the tasty Eridanous harissa-topped houmous I was preparing to scoff. Giving a flimsy plastic lid such a sharp edge is quite an achievement, but I cannot approve; imagine if somebody had suffered an accident, and I had helped them, but they were – unbeknownst to me – infected with a nasty blood-bourne disease; such an injury would have compromised my body’s natural defences, and made my own infection far more likely.

What I am saying is that Eridanous helps spread HIV.

And, therefore, that they are almost as bad as the Pope.

Edit 23:52: I actually feel bad about that joke. It was a joke! There is no way, even if there were a concerted and deliberate effort by the manufacturer to use extra-sharp lids on all of their pots of houmous (rather than it just being a trivial one-off accident), that any brand could be anywhere near as efficient at aiding the spread of disease as the Pope. And that’s ignoring all of the Pope’s other crimes. I’m sorry, Eridanous, I didn’t mean it – you’re not really anywhere near as bad as the Pope.

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